A Christmas Letter to My Gay Son

My dear Jacob,

As I was going through a box of keepsakes, I came across a Christmas list you had written when you were a young boy. On the list were things we could easily find in stores, and I always enjoyed finding them for you, wrapping them up and putting them under our tree. You were always so appreciative and opened them with great joy. The joy Papa and I felt was even greater.

There is only one gift I want to give you this year. I have wanted to give it to you for many years. I have tried in every way possible to find a way to give it to you. It would bring me the greatest joy of all.

How do I give you equality? How do I give you back the years you have missed "not being equal" in this world?

Your high school and college years should have been ones where you dated and went to proms and dances with someone you were attracted to and wanted to spend time with as a couple. You should not have had to spend those years working for your equality. You should not have had to defend your dignity. You should not have had to miss out on the simple pleasures of a young teen and a young adult.

There is no way I can give you back those years, those times when you should have been having fun, enjoying life, and growing from those experiences.

You had a passion for justice even as a child. I remember when you were 4 and refused to eat supper until I had actually written the check for Save the Children. You were the watchdog in your kindergarten classroom after you felt your teacher was wrong to rip up a child's painting in front of the class in her effort to teach them to write their names on their papers. On that day you spoke truth to power so eloquently as you confronted your teacher after school.

As soon as you came out to us, you wanted to start a gay/straight alliance at your high school. We worried for your safety, but even more for the isolation it might have brought as you worked to make it happen. You reached out to students, teachers, and the administration and created your school's first gay/straight alliance. When you were in college and heard that there were students being kicked out of colleges simply because they were gay, you founded the Soulforce Equality Ride to confront that terrible wrong.

Each of those times you taught me to take action and not be silent in the face of injustice. You have led me, and you have taught me throughout your life.

Maybe that is why it is so hard for me to face Christmas each year and not be able to wrap up the one gift I most want to give you. As a mother, it is such a part of my being to want to nurture and love my children. It is the mother in me that wants to protect and provide for you. It is the mother in me that is hurting so much when I am helpless in being able to give you the one gift I have wanted to give you since the day you told us you were gay.

I want to give you equality. I want to wrap it up in a beautiful box, and I want to put it under our tree right now. I want to see you open it on Christmas Eve and with great joy live with it all your days.

I love you,

Mama

2011 Marriage Equality Year in Review

2011 -- what a year for marriage equality. We're still not ready to get married yet, but wow we are so close. Think about where we were a year ago -- so much has happened. Let's do a quick year-in-review to look at all the amazing stuff of 2011, and look ahead to where we're going to win in 2012.

Gay-Inclusive Display Vandalized at Calif. Church

A gay-inclusive Christmas display at a Claremont, Calif., church was vandalized over the weekend, and police are calling the incident a hate crime.

The display at Claremont United Methodist Church, located in a college town east of Los Angeles, featured silhouettes of three couples holding hands: one male couple, one female couple, and one male-female couple. Someone knocked over the figures of the gay couples sometime late Christmas Eve or early Christmas morning, TV station KTLA reports.

The vandalism is classified as a hate crime “because of the content of the artwork that was damaged and the fact that it was on a place of worship or at a church,” Claremont police lieutenant Mike Ciszek told the station.

The United Methodist Church, as a denomination, does not endorse same-sex marriage, but some churches, including the Claremont congregation, have joined the Reconciling Ministries Network, fighting for LGBT equality within United Methodism.

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Gay marriage repeal a top issue in New Hampshire

Repealing New Hampshire’s gay marriage law, legalizing casinos and changing the constitution to bar an income tax are among the hottest topics facing the Legislature heading into 2012, but lawmakers might not vote on these issues until after the Jan. 10 presidential primary.

House Republican Leader D.J. Bettencourt says the House most likely won’t cast its votes until Jan. 11 or Jan 18. Bettencourt says the presidential candidates should have the spotlight until after the primary

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Two Women Share 1st Kiss at US Navy Ship’s Return

A Navy tradition caught up with the repeal of the U.S. military’s "don’t ask, don’t tell" rule on Wednesday when two women sailors became the first to share the coveted "first kiss" on the dock after one of them returned from 80 days at sea.

Petty Officer 2nd Class Marissa Gaeta of Placerville, Calif., descended from the USS Oak Hill amphibious landing ship and shared a quick kiss with her partner, Petty Officer 3rd Class Citlalic Snell of Los Angeles. The crowd screamed and waved flags around them.

Both women, ages 22 and 23 respectively, are fire controlmen in the Navy. They met at training school and have been dating for two years.

Navy officials said it was the first time on record that a same-sex couple was chosen to kiss first upon a ship’s return.

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Minnesota Catholic Bishop Nienstedt Asks State's Catholics to Recite Anti-Gay 'Marriage Prayer' at Mass

Virulent anti-gay Twin Cities Archbishop John Nienstedt, the guy who spearheaded a mass mailing last year of 400,000 anti-gay DVDs, has created a special "marriage prayer" which he is asking the state's Catholics to recite during Mass in an effort to create support for the anti-gay amendment on Minnesota's ballot in November 2012.
Here is Nienstedt's prayer:

Heavenly Father,

Through the powerful intercession of the Holy Family, grant to this local Church the many graces we need to foster, strengthen, and support faith-filled, holy marriages and holy families.

May the vocation of married life, a true calling to share in your own divine and creative life, be recognized by all believers as a source of blessing and joy, and a revelation of your own divine goodness.

Grant to us all the gift of courage to proclaim and defend your plan for marriage, which is the union of one man and one woman in a lifelong, exclusive relationship of loving trust, compassion, and generosity, open to the conception of children.

We make our prayer through Jesus Christ, who is Lord forever and ever. Amen.

Earlier this year, Nienstedt instructed every priest in the state to push for passage of the amendment. This appears to be another component of his evil plot.

Obama's Gay Marriage Views Will Evolve Before 2012 Election

In the New Yorker, former Clinton aide Richard Socarides writes on marriage equality and Obama's new political reality:

During the Clinton years, gay marriage was a relatively new issue and most Americans did not yet understand it. No one could be “gay-married” anywhere. When the Republican-led Congress presented Clinton with the Defense of Marriage Act a few short months before the 1996 election, I and members of the White House staff struggled in vain to come up with ways the President could veto it and stay consistent with what was then his stated opposition to the granting of marriage rights. (Clinton has since changed his mind.)

But now, the remarkable new reality for Obama in this election is that supporting marriage equality is smart politics.

Predicting this new reality along with DOMA will force Obama's hand before the election:

Many of the lawyers who follow these cases closely—and as one who served as an adviser to President Clinton on gay rights, I include myself in that category—believe that the odds favor marriage advocates. If so, these twin rulings from influential courts will have a substantial impact. The Supreme Court would likely hear final appeals by 2013.

The potential for those decisions, together with a rapid change in public opinion in favor of marriage equality, have clearly become factors in President Obama’s thinking. As a result, I believe that he will announce his support for same-sex marriage before the 2012 election.

'Big Gay Round-Up'

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United Nations’ landmark report calls for worldwide decriminalization of same-sex relations

The United Nations has produced its first ever report on LGBT rights, calling for the decriminalization of same-sex relations between consenting adults, and includes a call for protection and recognition of the self-identified gender of transgender persons.

The report comes following a request by the UN Human Rights Council’s High Commissioner for Human Rights, Navi Pillay, following an historic resolution in June of this year.

According to the report, “In all regions, people experience violence and discrimination because of their sexual orientation or gender identity.”

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Rick Santorum Blames Same-Sex Marriage For Plummeting Rates Of Marriage Across The Nation

Rick Santorum blamed gays for plummeting marriage rates in a bizarre tweet reacting to a Pew poll.

Think Progress LGBT notes: "Today, barely half of Americans over the age 18 are married. But Pew attributes the decline not to same-sex marriage — which would actually increase rates — but a combination of factors including: the social acceptance of cohabitation, a greater emphasis on higher education and career development, and the desire to develop financial independence before tying the knot."

Rosie Sends Gaydar Gun to Michele Bachmann

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Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

In their first television interview, Tyler Clementi’s parents Jane and Joe Clementi talked with NBC’s Kerry Sanders on Monday, telling her that the loss they still feel is “almost like a physical pain.”

“It’s like a tightening of the chest. It’s aching of the muscles and tightening of your face and your jaw and you’re clenching, and it just physically hurts,” said Jane Clementi.

Fox News invites anti-LGBT guests to justify discrimination against transgender Macy’s customer

During a December 11 segment on Fox News, host Shannon Bream invited former Macy’s employee Natalie Johnson and Mathew Staver, founder of the anti-LGBT Liberty Counsel, to discuss Johnson’s recent termination from her job in San Antonio, Texas.

Johnson was fired earlier this month after she violated Macy’s non-discrimination policy by challenging a transgender teenager who chose to use the woman’s changing room. With the help of the Liberty Counsel, she has filed a complaint with the U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission.

George Clooney: "Gay and lesbian people are born equal in dignity and rights"

Superstar George Clooney came out in support of gay and lesbian rights as he became the first actor to accept a role in Dustin Lance Black’s Los Angeles production of “8,” which reenacts the courtroom drama of the Proposition 8 trial.

“It is astonishing that gay and lesbian Americans are still treated as second-​class citizens,” Clooney said. “I am confident that, very soon, the laws of this nation will reflect the basic truth that gay and lesbian people — like all human beings — are born equal in dignity and rights.”

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He Died Waiting to Get Married

Derence Kernek and Ed Watson, who recorded a video for California’s 9th Circuit Court, requesting that they allow Judge Walker’s decision to overturn Prop 8 to stand. This request was because Watson had recently been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s and they wanted to be married while he still had memories of their 40 years together.

Last night, on the eve of these arguments, Ed passed away due to complications from his quickly-advancing Alzheimer’s and Diabetes. They were never married.

Colbert Takes On Perry's Anti-Gay Christmas Ad

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Direct Democracy Is 'Clearly Flawed'

The Daily Show took on California's ballot initiative system with a segment called "California's Direct Democracy Troubles."

God Will Punish The Nation because of Obama's Gay Rights Directive

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Dorothy's Ruby Slippers on Auction Block

The holy grail of movie memorabilia, the ruby slippers worn by Judy Garland in The Wizard of Oz, are expected to fetch $3 million when they’re auctioned in Los Angeles on December 16.

‘Gay rights are human rights, and human rights are gay rights’

In an historic policy speech delivered Tuesday, U.S. Secretary of State Hillary Clinton called for LGBT human rights protections around the globe.

Clinton outlined several steps the United States government will take to advance equal treatment of LGBT people under the law, and outlined in a Presidential memo that was released today by the White House.

More Than 100K Sign Petition to Reconsider Gay Marriage in Maine

"Gay-rights activists in Maine gathered more than 35,000 signatures on Election Day to support a 2012 ballot imitative that would allow same-sex couples to get marriage license, reported Equality Maine.

In 12 weeks volunteers were able to collect more than 100,000 signatures.

"Not only were we incredibly successful at gathering signatures at the polls today, but volunteers all over the state met voters who have changed their minds on this issue in the last two years," said Betsy Smith, EqualityMaine executive director.

NY Woman Sues School District for Failing to Stop Bullying of Her Gay Son

Traci Lanzone, the mother of a Marion, NY high school student is suing the school district, claiming that the school has failed to address the anti-gay bullying of her son, WHAM13 reports:

Traci Lanzone filed the lawsuit in federal court last week. She claims her son, who is not identified in court papers, has been relentlessly bullied over the last two school years. The harassment ramped up when he told classmates he is gay.

“Everything from being pushed, kicked, having food thrown at him, his clothes being hidden…it was just relentless,” Lanzone said.

Lanzone said she complained to Marion officials at least 30 times about the bullying. Her son also complained, but Lanzone said the harassment continued. Court papers say classmates carved anti-gay slurs into desks and yelled obscenities.The boy remains a student in the high school.

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Obama Directs International Agencies to Ensure Rights and Protection of LGBT People Abroad

President Obama today issued a memorandum directing the heads of Executive Departments and Agencies abroad to advance the human rights of and ensure the safety of LGBT people.Writes Obama in the memorandum, which you can read below:

The struggle to end discrimination against lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) persons is a global challenge, and one that is central to the United States commitment to promoting human rights. I am deeply concerned by the violence and discrimination targeting LGBT persons around the world -- whether it is passing laws that criminalize LGBT status, beating citizens simply for joining peaceful LGBT pride celebrations, or killing men, women, and children for their perceived sexual orientation. That is why I declared before heads of state gathered at the United Nations, "no country should deny people their rights because of who they love, which is why we must stand up for the rights of gays and lesbians everywhere." Under my Administration, agencies engaged abroad have already begun taking action to promote the fundamental human rights of LGBT persons everywhere. Our deep commitment to advancing the human rights of all people is strengthened when we as the United States bring our tools to bear to vigorously advance this goal.

By this memorandum I am directing all agencies engaged abroad to ensure that U.S. diplomacy and foreign assistance promote and protect the human rights of LGBT persons.

Agent of Change

Cheat Sheet for Thursday’s Prop 8 Hearing

Bachmann Left Speechless After Encounter With 8-Year-Old Boy

At a book signing in South Carolina, an 8 year-old boy named Elijah whispered to Michele Bachmann, "Miss Bachmann, my mommy's gay but she doesn't need any fixing."

I Will Stop Judges From Telling People What The Law Says

Michele Bachmann on Fox News Sunday told host Chris Wallace that as president she will stop judges from telling people what the laws are, tying into the very essence of what the Tea Party stands for: Don’t tell me what to do.



As any ten year old knows, the job of a judge, especially, say, judges on the Supreme Court, is to interpret and explain laws and pass judgment based on those interpretations.

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Kentucky Congregation Overturns Ban On Interracial Couples

An eastern Kentucky church under a firestorm of criticism since members voted to bar mixed-race couples from joining the congregation overturned that decision Sunday, saying it welcomes all believers.

Stacy Stepp, pastor of the Gulnare Free Will Baptist Church in Pike County, told The Associated Press that the vote by nine people last week was declared null and void after it was determined that new bylaws can't run contrary to local, state or national laws. He said the proposal was discriminatory, therefore it couldn't be adopted.

Stepp said about 30 people who attended church services voted on a new resolution that welcomes "believers into our fellowship regardless of race, creed or color."

The issue came up at the tiny all-white Appalachian church after the daughter of church secretary Dean Harville visited over the summer with her boyfriend, who is from Africa, and the two sang for the congregation.

Harville said he was approached in August by Melvin Thompson, the church member who crafted the resolution to bar mixed-race couples, and was told that his daughter and her boyfriend were no longer allowed to sing at the church.

Thompson has said he is not racist and called the matter an "internal affair."

What's going on...

Many of us have experienced the pain of teen bullying first-hand, and we’d reel from its effects in our room, hidden to the world. Thanks to a little thing called YouTube, bullied 14-year-old Jonah Mowry is going viral on the internet.

Hershey School Rejects HIV-Positive Philly Boy

"A private boarding school connected with the Hershey chocolate company says it was trying to protect other students when it denied admission to a Philadelphia-area teenager because he is HIV-positive.

The AIDS Law Project of Pennsylvania filed a lawsuit on behalf of the unidentified boy in U.S. District Court in Philadelphia on Wednesday, claiming the Milton Hershey School for disadvantaged students violated the Americans with Disabilities Act.

School officials acknowledged that the 13-year-old boy was denied admission because of his "medical condition." They said they believed it was absolutely necessary to protect the health and safety of the 1,850 others enrolled in the residential institution, which serves children in pre-kindergarten to 12th grade and where students live in homes with 10 to 12 others."

Love is...

Britain's Manliest Man Bares All For Elton John Charity

Rugby star Sacha Harding has bared all for a photo shoot for the U.K. magazine Gay Times to support Elton John’s AIDS foundation.

“AIDS is such a devastating disease for so many people around the world and I was honored to get this opportunity to try and do my part to help raise awareness of the disease and ultimately save lives," Harding says.

Last year Harding, who plays with Bedford Blues, was also voted "Britain’s manliest man" after winning a nationwide competition organized by men’s grooming brand the Bluebeards Revenge.

Harding is one of 54 men to appear in the magazine's annual "naked issue." Darren Scott, the editor of Gay Times, says in a statement that he was delighted to feature Harding on the front cover. "How could we not have Britain's manliest man on our cover?" he asks. "Our readers do like their men to be real men! It's an absolute joy to have a straight rugby player be so willing to take part in a shoot for Britain's longest-running gay magazine."

Harding is happy to help a cause he believes in. “I know I’m going to get some stick from the lads at Bedford but it’s all good fun and the whole campaign has a very serious message which needs promoting,” he says.

Nearly 3 out of 4 Americans with HIV don’t have infection under control

"Only about 1 in 4 Americans with the AIDS virus have the infection under control with medications, federal health officials said Tuesday.

Part of the reason is that about 20 percent of those infected with HIV don’t know it. People can have an infection for years without developing symptoms."